The not so middle age crisis

This 20sumthing, graduated and farigh, dunno what to do and if you know what to do then you don't know how to go about it; phase has to be the worst era of a person's life.

You get more opinionated as time goes, you regrettably realize the mistakes that have cost you a lot in terms of lost friends, relationships or opportunities, and the dumber decisions that has left you with probably the most superficial people you would ever meet in life.

You realize that despite of being a Masters from the best Uni in your country, its not you who gets that lucky chance and would anywayz have to starts as a trainee at the bottom of the hierarchy.

You realize that the top is certainly not lonely but getting there is fatal health issue inducing and years of crappy hard work.

You're insecure about where you stand now and don't know where you'd be seeing yourself in the next year…success becomes the elusive sexy siren that often makes you want to listen to your evil buddy, copy your rival's work and give it in to the boss with your name before they manage to. Highs without getting tipsy get rare, friends start harboring secrets that they weren't ashamed of sharing earlier.

You talk to the opposite sex without dissolving into a pool of giggles as soon as he leaves or jumping to conclusions about the way he wiggled his eyebrows at you..

You probably didn't even notice he had shaved off his eyebrows and are just interested in making sure that you did what you wanted done.

You lie in bed and compare your below average colleagues managing to hook up with the most fabulous of the guys and wonder why you cant even manage to engage someone's undying fairytale love for yourself, and with a few minutes you start wishing you were more cutesy flirtatious who found easy to flit from person to person then to dream for a nonexistent ideal.

You start writing Blog entries like these and realize how pessimistic you sound...or read entries like these and nod with each line coz it hits you squarely between the eye and you think... "how true"

And as soon as you read/write the line above you find solace in the fact that this phase is thankfully temporary.